Wedding Sneaky Peek - My BEAUTIFUL bag made by Marissa!

How can I thank her enough? It's just so, so, so perfect! I actually cried when I received it! The best thing I've received in the post EVER!

Wedding Sneaky Peek - My Veil

It's now finally finished! It's pretty plain, with a few diamantes that will catch the light in the church!

Only 24 days left...

Until the wedding. Holy crap, this thing has snuck up on me fast!

August 28th is my hen party. My best friend has organized an Ann Summers party, and that's as much as I'm allowed to know! I also know that the theme is black & pink, which is why I've made the t-shirts to match that!

So far I've made 6 t-shirts. Only 2 completed so far! Just another 14 "Claire's Hen Party" things to make, and another 18 "L" plates...Then just 20 names! I have 2 weeks to make these, and from start to finish, each t-shirt takes around 4 hours! Eek!

I took the t-shirts to the wedding shop that are doing my alterations, and they might start buying them from me...Although it takes a long time to make them, I could get £10 profit per t-shirt, so it could be worthwhile...We'll wait and see on that one!

I tried taking a couple of photographs, but they didn't turn out that well. I'm sure I'll get better pics when the girls are all wearing them!

This weekend, I plan on getting a photograph of our wedding rings, and I might even take a photograph of the church. Look out for the pics!

And final wedding news. Our best man has broken his arm, so he'll be in plaster for the wedding! So that means taking our neice ice skating (like she wanted) is out of the question! Lucky bugger gets out of that one! Heh!

My beautiful neice...Again!

I'm having a really hard time coming to terms with recent events. I really did think I was okay, but apparently, I'm not. My heart is physically hurting. It hurts so much I can't even describe it.

Anyway, I've not eaten anything hardly for a couple of weeks. This is probably a good thing, because in that 2 weeks, I've lost 1.5 inches around my back. I lost 5 kilograms last week alone!

This weekend was a busy one for me.

Saturday morning I had another dress fitting. Although my dress now fits comfortably, I'm still having the back taken apart and replaced with a corset. I think it will look nicer anyway, and it means that the dress will be unique.

Saturday afternoon we went to visit SIL. She lives around 25 miles away. It's a long drive which takes around an hour since there's a lot of hills to drive over and most of the way it's only 30MPH! We got there for around 4:00pm and didn't leave till like 8:00pm, so it was a long day overall.

Today we had planned to visit my other SIL, and she was cooking dinner for us. We left the house at midday, and we just got home (it's midnight)! We did other stuff too, but today was also a long day!

We spent a few hours with SIL, BIL & my neice. We also had dinner.

My neice is growing up way too fast! She's 3 months old now, and a real chatterbox. She had her 2nd set of injections this week and she was very sleepy. She was having a bath when we arrived as we were early, and then she slept for around 2 hours in her rocking chair thing. I then held her and she slept on me for over an hour...Although I was talking to her trying to wake her up - I wanted photographs! She wasn't having any of it!

We woke her up about 10 minutes after we needed to have left, so I did get my photo-time, allbeit just a few minutes! In that few minutes, there were a million expressions, and I managed to take 95 photographs, so it wasn't all bad!

This evening we met up with the vicar to discuss the wedding service. Since we didn't leave SIL's till late, we missed the church service, but our appointment with the vicar wasn't till 7:00pm, so we were on time for that. My Dad had been to the service though.

The vicar asked us about where we met and how long we've been together etc. He also asked about where we worked and how long we've been engaged and why we wanted a church service. My Dad has put some ideas forward for hymns, since he was with us at the meeting too. We're not 100% decided on what we want yet though!

I'm sure when the vicar adds up the dates of us meeting, he'll realize I was far too young to be in a nightclub! Heh!

Anyway, some pics of my neice:

Long time, no see!

The last time I saw my cousin was when her eldest daughter was christened...10 years ago!

My cousin emigrated to Iceland not too long after her daughter was christened, and even though she tries to visit the UK every year, we just never had chance to visit.

I made the 3 hour (each way) journey to my Aunts house to visit, and meet the 2 kids I hadn't yet met!

We went to the beach in Fairbourne and I took the kids in the sea. The water was freezing cold and my jeans were soaking wet after going knee-deep in the water! Luckily I had a change of clothes in the car!

I took a few photographs before I left, and although they're not great, they're good memories!

I'm hoping it's not another 10 years before we meet up again! Hopefully Des & I will be able to save some money and then we can spend a week in Iceland visiting!

Wedding sneaky peek - Our RINGS!!

Since Sunday marked the 2 month countdown, we decided to head to the Trafford Centre to finally make a decision on rings.

We went to Goldsmiths first of all, and I found a ring that I quite liked. It was 18ct yellow gold with diamond cut white gold band in the centre, so it was all sparkly. I wasn't 100% certain, so we carried on looking.

We headed to Ernest Jones, Beaverbrooks, another goldsmiths and then H. Samuel.

Des wanted a really plain band, and we looked at the titanium ones, tungsten ones, yellow gold and white gold...He wasn't too sure about anything, so started trying some on. He fell in love with a white gold band, which was shiny round the edges but dull in the middle. Luckily for us, the ring had 75% off and only cost £53.99! Our first bargain of the day!

Since I hadn't yet fallen in love with anything (we weren't particularly looking at me at the time) we headed back to all of the shops we'd previously been to. I tried a few and umm'd and ahh'd. Finally we ended up back in H. Samuel, and the woman asked me what I wanted...

My engagement ring was bought when I was 16/17. It only cost £119, and although I love it, it's falling apart! So I wanted a ring that was simple, elegant, and sligtly sparkly - preferably with diamonds! And of course, it had to match Des', so white gold.

She brought out the 18ct white gold, and I couldn't really see any that I absolutely loved...so next came platinum and Des' & I both raised an eyebrow...As if we could afford platinum?!

Our budget for rings was £400, and since Des' was just over £50, it gave me £350 to spare. However, we wanted to get as cheap as possible!

The woman showed me a platinum ring that was on sale......I loved it instantly and then she gave me the price...£349! Yay! Within budget and absolutely gorgeous! The ring is a simple thin but sturdy band, with 9 inset diamonds totalling 0.5 carat! The ring had 50% off, and was reduced from £700 - so there was our second bargain of the day! And we only went over budget by £2.99!

Des already has his ring as they re-sized it in the shop with it being the last one. Mine is having to be ordered in, and I'll be picking it up probably this Saturday! I can hardly wait! I'll definitely be taking photographs when I get both of them!

The photographs are directly from the H. Samuel website. Des' is below, and mine is at the beginning of the post! Enjoy...

Wedding sneaky peek - Mine & my Dad's song...

We've been struggling to find a song for me & my Dad to dance to. Initially, he wanted to dance to the song I was named after, which is Clair, by Gilbert O'Sullivan, but the words aren't that great.

I went through my entire playlist on my iPhone, and looked at CD's and finally settled on a choice of two. It was between Mark Cohn's 'A Song for my Daughter' and Heartlands 'I Loved her First'.

When I listened to both with me Dad, we both cried listening to 'I loved her First'...So it's definitely the one! Here's the lyrics:

Look at the two of you dancing that way

Lost in the moment and each others face

So much in love your alone in this place

Like there's nobody else in the world

I was enough for her not long ago

I was her number one

She told me so

And she still means the world to me

Just so you know

So be careful when you hold my girl

Time changes everything

Life must go on

And I'm not gonna stand in your way

But I loved her first and I held her first

And a place in my heart will always be hers

From the first breath she breathed

When she first smiled at me

I knew the love of a father runs deep

And I prayed that she'd find you someday

But it still hard to give her awayI

loved her first

How could that beautiful women with you

Be the same freckle face kid that I knew

The one that I read all those fairy tales to

And tucked into bed all those nights

And I knew the first time I saw you with her

It was only a matter of time

But I loved her first and I held her first

And a place in my heart will always be hers

From the first breath she breathed

When she first smiled at me

I knew the love of a father runs deep

And I prayed that she'd find you someday

But its still hard to give her away

I loved her first

From the first breath she breathed

When she first smiled at me

I knew the love of a father runs deep

Someday you might know what I'm going through

When a miracle smiles up at you

I loved her first

And here's a link to a youtube video so you can hear the song in full!

A beyond horrible photograph, but here's my wedding dress!

My parents have gone to Egypt for a week, so I had to take my Nan to my parents house to look after their dogs.

It worked out really well, because the following day I had to pick up my wedding dress anyway!

So I picked up my Nan on Friday night after work, and realized I'd forgotten my camera about 20 mins up the motorway. I turned round, ran in my house and picked it up - I couldn't NOT have photographs of my dress!

I got to my parents house, and put the camera battery on charge. Phew! It hasn't been charged since January, so the battery was running low and I didn't want to risk not having photographs on Saturday!

On Saturday morning, my sister shouted at me loads! As you know (see previous post if you don't) I've been having a crappy time, and I'm having to sleep a LOT. By the time I'd got to my parents house on Friday night, it was 2am, and although I went to bed straight away, I needed to be up at 8am to get ready. I wasn't up until 8:30 and my sister was going crazy! Well, the tears came, and about 3 cigarettes later we were ready to go. I grabbed the camera and off to pick up the dress we went!

I'm having my dress alterations done at a different shop to where I bought my dress, so I had to try it on at that shop and then drive it to the other place, which is about 25 miles away from the first! The dress was a VERY tight fit, and I had to take off my bra to give extra room!

We got to the second shop and after walking across the town with my dress draped over my arm, my handbag in my other hand and my camera on my back, I was pretty hot and flustered, and sticky! I came to trying on the dress in the second shop and it wouldn't fasten all the way to the top. Apparently your body swells when you're hot...

I asked my sister to take a couple of photographs...We got out the camera to find that it wasn't working. Like a tool I'd forgotten to put the battery back in that morning! Eek! So my sister had to use the USELESS camera on her blackberry to take a photograph.

I'm off to try the dress in another 2 weeks with the girls and my neice. It will be the first time we've all had our dresses on together...And I'll be making sure that I take the camera and battery next time!

Finally ready to say it...

I found out last week that I had another miscarriage.

When I had that first appointment with my new doctor, because of the symptoms I'd described to him, he 'suspected' I'd had a miscarriage based on my history. He wanted blood tests immediately. I put off the blood tests for almost a week (6 days) hoping that they wouldn't be able to tell me either way as I wasn't sure I would be able to cope with it emotionally.

Anyway, they did an overnight test on one of the 5 vials and I got the results last Thursday.

Surprisingly, I'm okay emotionally, but physically I'm a mess. I'm having to get about 13 hours of sleep a day and it's taking everything I have to get up and get to work. I've got another appointment with the doctor tomorrow to discuss the results of the other blood tests and to sort out some kind of plan for the PCOS.

I have this awful feeling that because of where I am at the moment physically, he'll send me to the hospital. I know he's going to want more blood and I'm convinced he'll also order another ultrasound, even though I have one scheduled on the 1st of July.

I had a crappy day on Friday having to tell work the reasons I have a million and one appointments, and sorting out the time off work for them etc. So I went to see the kids on Sunday to cheer me up.

Since Sunday was also Fathers Day, we visited both sets of parents, too.

Oh, and in other news...This is exciting...My wedding dress has finally arrived! I'll be picking it up on Saturday morning at 10:30am sharp! I need to try it on in the shop, and then I'm taking it away to another shop to have the alterations done ready for the big day! I'm hoping that the girls' bags can be made out of the excess material on my dress!

Look out for wedding dress photos on Saturday night or Sunday at some point!

There's a pic of me!

Des took a photograph of me & my nephew, Thomas, today.

I look terrible...and according to my Mum, "awfully pale"! Yeah, that will be the week from hell I've just had! LOL!

Anyway, it's the first pic of me with any of the kids, since I'm always the one behind the camera! Just a shame Des made me blurry!

Here's some more pics of Tom, too:

My beautiful neice is now 7 weeks old!

We went to visit today, and although we only intended to stay for around an hour, we were there 3 - Oops!

Lele (prounounced lay-lay - Her nickname) was having a bath when we arrived. She wasn't enjoying it and she was letting everyone know! Daddy nearly got pee'd on, which was pretty funny, but bathtime was over within a few minutes of our arrival!

Next came cuddles to calm her down, and then she had her dinner - courtesy

of her Mummy! Heh! I know Des was pretty embarrassed when his sister flopped out a boob, but it's natural...and he soon could look at his sister when we were all chatting! Heh!

After Lele had her dinner, she sat on her Mummy's knee and was coo-ing! She's such a sweetie, but is determined not to let her parents get more than an hour or two of sleep each night! I think she's going to be a diva when she's older!

My darling little neice has 2 hernias, and has to have at least one of them operated on in the near future. She has an umbilical hernia (which is huge) and one lower down on her stomach. It's the one lower down that needs correctling, so they're just waiting for the hospital to give them a date.

After around 2 hours, I demanded photo time! Okay, I didn't demand it, but I asked very nicely if we could now do some photographs!

We put Lele in her moses basket so I could try and get some photographs similar to last time to compare her growth. She now weighs approximately 7lbs, and is getting very long! She's definitely grown since we last saw her!

Whilst I was taking photographs, Lele pulled so many faces! Her expressions are priceless! Every few seconds there was a new expression! Of course, I couldn't capture them all for laughing, and the ones I did get came out blurry (oops again)! But I think I managed to get a few really good ones!
I plan on visiting at least once a month, so that I can do a scrapbook of her first year, month by month. They literally live about 5 minutes from where I work, so it shouldn't be too difficult to visit lots and lots!

Anyway, onto the photographs:

The compulsary crying photo!

Summer = BBQ time!

And today we went to our first BBQ of the year!


It was awesome! We had chicken kebabs, chinese style burgers, ribs, and tons of other stuff! It's like 6 hours later and I'm still full!

Now I want another BBQ! lol!

New Years Goal #3...

I was thinking that this goal would be completely unachieveable this year...Guess what? It may not be!

My cycles have been completely screwed up the past few months, and things have gotten much worse since I began losing weight. So today, I took myself off to the doctors for my bazillionth appointment.

I fully expected to see my usual GP, and I went in there with the mindset "I need to go on the pill to sort myself out!". My GP wasn't there and I got to see a new guy today. Holy crap was I surprised?!

I started off by telling him I've had horrific cycles the past few months, and this most recent one has had me so ill, I've had to take over a week off work. He looked at all of my notes and agreed with the PCOS diagnosis, but wasn't sure why I hadn't had a scan of my ovaries yet...Because the other doctor didn't request it maybe?!

He started talking testing and treatment and I was so happy that I got a lump in my throat and I was ready to scream, jump up and down and cry with joy!

The Dr wanted a blood sample today since I'm on CD9, but the nurse was unavailable, and I didn't want to drive to the hospital because my sense of direction is terrible. My appointment for the blood test is on Wednesday, and they're testing for a few things that I can't remember (other than a peak of something) and progesterone levels.

The next step is to have a scan of my ovaries and be monitored via blood tests for a couple of cycles before starting treatment. He mentioned a few options, but the only one that stuck out in my mind was metformin, since all the googling I've done over the years has thrown that medication into the text!

He prescribed some tranexamic acid to slow down the heavy periods to take for upto 4 days during my period.

Seriously, I'm absolutely thrilled that finally I'm getting somewhere, and the Dr doesn't think my age is a problem at all! I think this is the first doctors appointment I've ever had where I've come out happy!

Wedding sneaky peek - Nikki's Dress!

I forced my sister to try on her dress again today. The bugger has lost more weight, so the dress is a bit big...I'm just so glad we can get it altered!

Nikki still hates the dress and thinks it makes her look fat! She'll be stood next to me, so she'll look very skinny! Heh! She's talking about dieting more before the wedding, but I think she looks a healthy weight. Also, when she diets, her boobs shrink and SOMETHING will need to hold that dress up all night!

Wedding sneaky peek - Sarah's Shoes!

I took Sarah to get her shoes last week too. We decided to have ivory shoes for her, my sister and my neice and they're going to be dyed another colour after the wedding so they can be worn again.


Sarah decided to go for a huge heel...I just really hope they're comfy for her to be wearing for the ceremony! Heh!